A Little Bit of This......And That!

Damon's

My favorite restaurant in my area is Damon's Grill... If you do not have one in your area, it is a place for Ribs, Steak and Spirits... I love the food and the atmosphere. I also love that they have a bunch of big screen TV's to watch all your favorite sporting events. They also have NTN Buzztime trivia!!! None of my friends care for it too much, nor does my girlfriend... But, since it is my favorite, I get to go there!!! Why don't they like it, you ask? Well, the service is horrible, you rarely get things the way you order it, and it usually takes forever. I like it because you never know what you are gonna get... And you always have something to laugh about. If you expect the unexpected... This is the place for you. I'll give you a few examples... You be the judge.

• There is one particular waitress that takes your order, then you don't see her again until it is time to pay the bill... As an added bonus, if you pay with a credit card, she will not bring you a pen. As a matter a fact, she has been heard saying this.... Wait for it...... "You brought your own pen, right?"

• If you want to play NTN Buzztime trivia, the same waitress will surprise you with the fact that she does not know what a Playmaker is( the gameboard that you play trivia on ). They have had this trivia system for many years! She will give you a look kinda similar to a puppy tilting his head when he is confused.

• You might not get everything exactly how you want it. I always ask for a water and a Coke... I usually get one of the two. I always say "No lemon in my water".... ( I like my water to taste like water, not Pledge) I usually get the lemon anyhow. I like extra dressing with my salad... never get it. Your food will not be cooked how you like it, and they may forget something. Expect it.

• It takes them at least 2 hours to clean off a dirty table. There seems to be no hurry or method to cleaning... first, they may take the dishes off.... and whatever the next step is will be a half hour later. It is funny how the tip will be picked up immediately after the customers leave.

• When you do play trivia, the questions appear on one of the big screen Tv's, and you answer them on your Playmaker. Sometimes there is a retard in the bar that wants to yell the answers out loud. You know that person.... there are 14 people playing, but this person wants to ruin the game for everyone. I have no problem telling the person to stop yelling out the answers, but it doesn't matter. On a side note.... Advice to you people who like to shout out the answers.... Please shout out the right answer, because it is sad and embarassing to show the world how stupid you are.

So, those are some minor reasons.... but, they have the best after dinner mints..... ever! If you have any good or bad stories from Damon's, or any other places.... leave a comment!

New Years' Eve
(some events from the night)

"My Taxidermist Did My....."

This a very short story... but, too funny to leave out. I was at the bar and Shaf was talking to one of his buddies.... all I heard was this.... "Last year my taxes got all messed up when I took them to my taxidermist." Well enough said I guess. For those who do not want their taxes messed up.... do not take them to someone who stuffs animals( a taxidermist ).... just take them to an accountant.

I Told You to Move to Nebraska....

I swear I told you to move to Nebraska... I was trying to help. Just think if you would have listened! You could have been partying there, you could have been happy because Nebraska beat Michigan 32-28 in the Alamo Bowl! Oh yeah... and you would not have got punched in the mouth by Lauren like I said was going to happen. Not only are you responsible for getting yourself beat up... but, also that big motherfucker that decided to help you. You guys want a play by play real quick, don't you? Ok, I got you................ So we are on the dance floor, having a good time.... and "Hat Girl" comes and tries to dance with me because she wants my New Years' hat. ( IRONIC ) Anyway, I tell her to get off me.... And Lauren comes over and says.... "Remember me?"

Hat Girl: "Yes"
Lauren: "You wanna talk shit now?"
Hat Girl: "Listen I don't want any problems, I am grown"
Lauren: "Ok then apologize to me"
Hat Girl: "I am not apologizing for anything"
Lauren puts her drink and purse down
Lauren: "Apologize"
Hat Girl: "Fuck Y....."
(sentence not finished due to Laurens' fist in her mouth)
Lauren continues to beat her ass... and some 400 pound dude grabs Lauren. Mistake. So Shaf runs at him and pulls him off of her, then punches him in the mouth. I can't just let Shaf handle this big boy on his own (even though I am sure he could have taken him out by himself )... anyways, is that not what your boys are for? So, as we play Pinball with this dude's face.... he goes down quickly. He gets up, with help of his friends, and says "Who hit me?"... Bro, you know who hit you. Go clean off your face, and call it a night. Don't ever put your hands on a girl. And Hat Girl..... I don't think hats are your thing.


Pop The Cork..... Or Don't!


I am very disappointed at the "11th Hour Nite Club" for not providing Champagne for New Years' Eve! You don't have to give it away for free.... sell it! You could have made a few bucks. Instead we had free shots of Apple Pucker and 7-Up? What is that? Pucker is used to flavor other liqours... it is very weak. I had to be a dick to people, even as I was agreeing with them. They were complaining about the weak shots, as I was telling them to zip it.... because they were free. The bar dropped the ball......

So, that was New Years' Eve.... exciting! What did you do? Tell me!

Browns' Game Trip.....



Alphabet Game

You all know this game.... on a long road trip, you find signs with words that go in order of the alphabet.... you know like "A"= Allstate.... "B"= Burger King.... etc, etc. Lauren sometimes likes to cheat. For example.... One day we were playing and we were on "D".... Lauren says "J.D. Byrider!!!" Ok No. In the same game we were on "F".... and she says "422 Motel".... No! "It starts with an "F".... the number 4 does start with an "F".... but that is cheating. That is like seeing a picture of a tree and saying "T"! Speaking of "T".... we were on the way to the Browns game, we were playing this game.... we were on "H" and Lauren screams out "Through!" She was dead serious guys..... and it starts with a "T". We continue the game until we get to "Q"... we struggle for about a half an hour, and everyone just gave up. The car breaks down on the highway... it over heated, so we had to wait for it to cool down. Fun. We finally get rolling, and Lauren decides to call her retarded ex ( who irons his underwear ) for the best way to get to downtown Cleveland.... and she is talking to him and says "We just passed a sign that said Toledo......", so he tells us we went too far and to turn around. I had no idea why we were getting off the highway.... until she told me. I am like "We are going the right way.... get back on the highway." We can't find the highway, so we stop at a Fire Station for directions. Listen, there are 500 signs that say Toledo.... as a matter of fact, they go all the way to Toledo. As we are getting back on the highway.... Lauren yells out "Quiet!" I was confused because no one was talking..... she was still playing the alphabet game.

By the way... the Browns won, but who cares? They still suck, and The STEELERS' are going to the playoffs!

Sexy Fat Guy

I have started to go to the gym again..... I was 235 when I started, and after one week I am down to 227! Just wait 'til I get really going..... I am gonna be a stud again. I mean not that I haven't always been! You've got to admit that I am one sexy fat guy!